I saw this, And it made me feel kinda sad

[Senyx The Soulless one]

8:09 AM 3/16/2008

Why do i have to learn all this? I just want to study computers and how they work, If the world is building for a better future.
should we not have a choice of our roles in it? Maybe everyone thinks we need to know this stuff, Maybe they even EXPECT it,
How else are we gonna get a job to pay to be taxed by this stagnating country ran by loonies in suits?

Maybe i'm just being too optimistic about my freedom. Ahh well.


8:20 AM 3/20/2008

It's truly amazing how complex and educational computers can be! But since i can hardly access them, I try and learn all i can
With my time.
Ever since my mom got Cancer, I've been trying to balance helping around the house and my personal life.
Well, I've already lost a few of my friends. But taking care of my mom is more important, Right?
-Sigh- I just wish i had more time to myself. I really want to go out and be with people.

8:51 AM 3/27/2008

I've decided.
I'm gonna make computer stuff.
I've been researching all the known viruses, And i gotta say, Some of them are downright mean.
But that just gives me determination.
I feel like we all have a choice here on earth, To do what we feel we can, Or to do what OTHERS feel we can. I'm not like them
I'm different.
I see the world for what it really is. I see dreams crushed by others. I see futures lost by small; miniscule mistakes.
Errors in judgement? Or judgement in errors?
What has this place become, Where we are all pawns in someones game. Make your own future, Like i will make mine.
Mistakes are the stepping stones of lessons. So why must we always pay?

10:17 AM 3/30/2008
Mom's nagging me by texts, Keeps asking if "I'm doing work" What else is there to do?
She took the "Liberty" of signing me and my brother up for therapy, Apparently, Talking to someone i don't know about something that is
none of their buisiness is considered "Coping"

Whatever. I know how to cope. It's her money being wasted.

8:05 AM 4/02/2008
Looks like i get to try 40mg of this stuff. Apparently, It's the highest legal dosage, But whatever doc says. I just need
It to work, Focusing on what's important has been a real pain lately. Well, We'll just see if it works, Who knows? Maybe my life will get better.
Mom throwing more fits as usual. Maybe it's time to find a place of my own?

9:27 AM 4/09/2008
Why do i seem to make friends better over the computer? Is it really so bad that it's come to this? Some people call it antisocial.
I think that the internet is a great way to hang out without being judgemental. But some people DO do those things.
But not the people I hang out with. They're cool. But our age differences are what set us apart, You could be talking to a 13
Year old kid and think he was some 20 year old cool guy, It's all about mental maturity.
I have friends in real life. But i don't have nearly as much fun with them.
I just want to be with people that know how i feel.

11:43 AM 3/15/2008
I just talked to my principal today, We talked about a lot of things, For like, 3 hours! She was explaining to me that my mom is in bad shape, And that she needs all the help she can get, And we
talked about how my social life got ruined, And that i need to face mom and tell her i need some "Me" time, So i guess
From here on, I just need to start getting on top of all this, And facing things instead of showering them in my own personal
Dreams and wishes. Ahh, I just wish i could talk to someone like that more, It feels good to know someone is out there
That cares enough to sit down and help others through hard times.


If this moved you, Please post back and let us know, It makes me wonder.