[Hazu]

"Ah, there you are! Wait up!"

It was a typical Tokyo night. The moon was shining, the sky was clear, and the city was lit up with streetlights like a thousand stars. The city, contrary to sleeping, was just starting to wake up for the night life. The ordinary citizens, those who actually slept at night and worked in day, were ready to cuddle up in their beds. I envy them, really – it was hard work being a college student working double time to pay tuition. I sighed and looked around at the almost empty subway station. It was past 11 already; even the ticket masters were starting to yawn and disappear. There were a few people here and there, but that was it.

"No, don’t go, I’m here! Wait for me!"

I heard the roar of an incoming missile, and the headlights of the subway appeared in the dark tunnel hole. I waited patiently for it to completely stop, then stepped in as the doors opened. I took a look around the cabin, which brought a satisfied smile to my face. Maybe once, I’ll actually get to sit, I mused as I started towards a pair of empty seats at the far back for me and my bag.

"Wait! Don’t close the doors! I’m still coming!" A panicked voice strung across the automatic "the doors will now close" message. I turned around at the stricken voice and brashly stopped the door with my hand in time for a girl to stumble in. The train supervisor yelled at me from somewhere down the station, and I let the doors close. There was a moment of silence following, filled only by the girl’s heavy panting from the run she just had. Suddenly, as if on cue, several people moved away a couple of seats. I glared at them, and then lowered my head to take a look at the girl.

"You okay?" I whispered. "Go ahead and take a seat." I smiled in what I hoped was a reassuring way.

"Why didn’t you wait for me? I was calling out to you the whole time, but you didn’t even bother turning around!" The girl suddenly stepped forwards and grabbed my shirt, taking me by surprise. She raised her tear-streaked face and looked at me sorrowfully. "Did I embarrass you by shouting out your name in public? Is it because I’m wearing something weird? I’m sorry! I-I’m s-sorry!" Her voice got louder, then softer as she lowered her head, tears dripping down from her cheeks to her shoes. I stood speechless as she let go of my shirt and crumpled into a ball on the floor. There was another moment of awkward silence throughout the cabin until I found my voice.

"N-no! Not at all! You didn’t embarrass me… um, here, take a seat. Wipe your tears." I hesitantly took the girl’s arm, and when she didn’t react, led her to a nearby pair of seats. I sat down myself, then fumbled around in my bag and produced a tissue. Using the tissue, I dabbed at her cheeks gently to dry her tears. She started at my touch, but calmed down and sat there quietly. I finished drying up her tears and took her hand. Using my index finger, I traced the Japanese character for big on her palm. She looked at me curiously.

"Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Think about being big, about letting your emotions go. Think about being free." I spoke in what I hoped to be a tranquil voice, then closed my eyes as an example. After a moment of hesitation, the girl followed my actions and closed her eyes as well. We stayed in peace for a minute.

"Thanks… I feel better now." The girl broke the silence. I opened my eyes and saw her looking at me with a smile on her face. "Sorry for causing such a scene, I must’ve embarrassed you." I opened my mouth to protest, but she kept going. "But, for being able to have you rescue me like that… I think it was worth making a fool out of myself. You know, I think that’s the first time you’ve held my hand like that and led me to a seat. It made me feel warm inside, butterfly-y…"

I nodded. She continued speaking.

"You know, I waited for you all this afternoon, from the time we decided to meet – 3 in the afternoon – to now. And I wondered if you would come, or if you would call me and tell me that you were busy, but you finally showed up. I’m so glad I waited for you. It’s so nice…"

I expected the sentence to continue, but there was only the soft rumbling of the subway as the girl fell silent. I looked down. She had fallen asleep with her head on my shoulder. Almost subconsciously, I reached out and took her hand and squeezed it. Who knew how tired she was? She waited for eight hours... In the back of my mind, I heard the train call out my stop. I stood up slowly, trying to not disturb her sleep, and walked towards the doors. As the doors opened and I stepped out, I turned around to look at the girl, still sleeping in the subway seat. Then the doors closed, and the subway disappeared down the black tunnel.

No, I didn’t ever see her again. I often wonder who her boyfriend was, and how she mistook me for him. I wonder if my actions gave her pain, or joy. But whoever she was, wherever she is now, I wish her luck in life.