I wish...
 

to be happy again...

it looks like that's far down the road.

=/

Goodnight.

What's making you unhappy? D:

spirit felt looked at his moobs...

Stuff that I'm sure FF wishes to not hear.

I wish that's all it was

=/

Booyah - on a serious note. If you ever need someone to talk to, you can PM me, I am a good listener and a great secret-keeper. Just to let you know that there is someone out there that is willing to listen to you and maybe offer you some advice. I am old enough to have some knowledge and experience behind me, yet still young enough to understand the younger views.

I'm sure you are, and I thank you for the offer...

maybe if I feel like writing anything soon, I'll PM it to you.

Now to take meds, and knock myself out to sleep.

I'll most likely be online for 10-15 mins...

I just close my eyes and forget stuff when I'm sad. I'm pretty good at forgetting stuff. =_=

LOL same. x3

What I call a talent, some people call a "problem". :D


@booyah: If you want to, you could own me in PvP a few times. /I go afk and you take out your anger on my man-bra'd fighter. D:

booyah..you are a sad or angered, try beating up anything you see that's not alive. It works for me

Eh, don't beat things up... if you get hurt hitting em it'll probably piss you off more. o.O

For me I find that moving about helps to ease the troubles, even temporarily. Going for a jog is nice... especially early morning or just before the sun sets (before the mosquitoes come out). :3 Hope you feel better soon though.

You can't just close your eyes and forget this.
=/
I logged into Fiesta for about 5 minutes, and got pissed off more by the decline of GoR standards. I saw a lvl 48 fighter ffs. The application clearly says 6x+.
Wth? Nö. My brother used to do that, and I'm not him.
I'm not allowed out of my house. I used to do it when I was allowed outside. And no, I'm not grounded...

my mother doesn't want me out late in case something would happen, and she might have to pay for it.

I don't understand her logic.

Try listening to music. I know that certain songs calm me down or make me feel happy when I'm feeling down.

^I don't understand that site very well =/

It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday." Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

"Jack, did you hear me?"

"Oh, sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.

"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.

"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.

"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.

"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching m e things he thought were important..Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.

The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.

"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.

"The box is gone," he said

"What box?" Mom asked.

"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was "the thing I value most," Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.
"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said.

"I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox "Signature required on a package No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention. "Mr. Harold Belser" it read. Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside

"Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life." A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as te ars filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved:

"Jack, Thanks for your time! - Harold Belser."

"The thing he valued most was...my time"


Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.

"I need some time to spend with my son," he said

"Oh, by the way, Janet, thanks for your time!"

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,"

Think about this. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.


1 At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you

4. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
5. You mean the world to someone.

6. If not for you, someone may not be living.

7. You are special and unique

8. When you th ink you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you trust God to do what's best, and wait on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or something better.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it.

10. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.

11. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.

12 Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks

13. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know and you'll both be happy.

14. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

Thanks for taking the time to read this!!

Whoa... Where did you get this?

I actually received in in an e-mail today at work and it seemed to fit, so I decided to share it.

Talk about right timing XD.

Wow.. seeing as it only made me cry harder.

All the names in that thing are the names of the people involved.

O.o

Umm...

If you must know... which I don't know who will...

First off, parents want a divorce. That's already killing me inside as it is, so yeah... Then my Dad calls me from Cali, to inform me that my relatives that lived in Illinois died. I haven't spoken to them in forever because of the reasons given in the story. Career, school, not girls... just girl. And on second look... the name of the guy that died isn't right... but pretty close. I was more thrown off by Jack in there, and the other name being so close, I think I just read it wrong.

On top of that, since my parents won't even let me out of the house, I feel trapped. I'm not allowed to go outside and have friends, which is why I spend 99% of my home time on my laptop. Many times has my step-dad (Jack) told me that I need to get a new hobby. I simply told him that he needs to inform his wife of that.

I feel neglected because they're always fighting. I feel unloved. I have no friends, I have no life, and because of that, I'm looking pretty much desperately for someone to love me.

Mazlo's pyramid of needs is 100% true.

I feel as if I'm not loved, therefore I'm putting of self-improvement and looking to be loved.

I've truly let myself go, and as many times as I tell myself that I'm going to get better... all I look for is someone to talk to, and for someone to love me.

Since I'm not going to find that anytime soon... happiness is a ways down the road.

D:

^Pretty much.

Except... showing emotions right now is sooo hard.

And someone came up to me today, and was like, "You need to be happier."

All I could say was, "Look... for someone who's energetic, happy, and always on the go 99% of his life... when something's bringing me down this much that I don't feel like doing anything, it's obviously something big. Leave me alone."

=/

I feel like such a loser...

I'm out.

I left...

and then my mother walks into my room.

"Joe says you were sad today, is that true?"

"Yeah."

"Is it because of what I said?"

"Yeah."

"Well... I just want to get away. Jack is being an asshole more than usual. I don't think it's going to happen, but I don't want to put up with more of this."

"Yeah... well I still don't feel happy."

"Whatever."

"Your guys' fights are getting worse, and on a regular basis. How am I supposed to feel?"

"I don't fight. Talk to Jack about that."

"Ok."

"Whatever..." -storms out of my room, slamming my door shut-

Like her telling me that was supposed to make me feel instantly better?

Yeah... still feelin' the love.